There were 5 in the bed and the little one said; roll over, roll over
So they all rolled over and one fell out
And went to sleep in a different bed
There were 4 in the bed and the little one said; roll over, roll over
So they all rolled over and one clung to the edge of the mattress
And put one foot on the cold floor
There were 4½ in the bed and the little one climbed over the big one and shouted at the middle one
And the middle one cried
And the little one begged for milk
And the big one grumbled
And the really big one reminded them all that it was 5 am and it was in fact her bed in the first place.
Lesson learnt: Don’t presume that you can get away with having a little holiday sans childers without some kind of payback, even 3 weeks after your return.